Women

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Women

September 8, 2002 4:28 AM

I just realized that I have never been interested in a woman that didn't already have a boyfriend. In my entire life.

Now it's not like I know there's a boyfriend, and that's why I'm interested. The classic wanting what one can't have sort of thing. Nope, I have an uncanny ability to scope out the women that are taken without even explicitly knowing they're taken. Sometimes I find out within an hour or two of meeting them. Other times it takes a couple dates. Once, it took several months before I realized that, while she claimed to not have a boyfriend, she really did. And not only that, she was totally in love with him.

Is there some vibe they give off that draws me to them? The "you want me, but you can't have me" vibe? I don't think that's it, because I usually only get involved with women that seem to be fairly interested in me. It's not like they're going overboard in the hard-to-get game. I probably do this because I think it means they don't have a boyfriend.

Which leads me to my newly formulated theory. Maybe the reason they seem so interested in me is precisely because they know nothing is actually going to happen. They're already spoken for, so there's no reason to work hard at disguising any feelings. Whereas if they are available and know something could actually happen, they give much more subtle clues. Clues that I need to be able to discern, but haven't been able to.

I'm sure there are a few people who are offended by me taking a rather small sample set and projecting my theories on an entire sex, but please keep in mind one thing.

I'm just trying to figure out this elaborate human mating ritual. I've done a pretty good job of determining how the rest of human social interaction works, but this one still seems to elude me. I keep hearing about this great thing called love that is supposed to make life worthwhile, but I just haven't found it.

Not even close.